Amazon Contest

Discussion in 'EXPAT Knives®' started by Expat, Jul 7, 2017.

  1. Expat

    Expat Expat™ Knives Staff Member

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    I love the funny reviews on Amazon. (Here's some: http://www.boredpanda.com/funny-amazon-reviews/)

    I'm starting a contest. Funniest/best cleaver review gets a sticker packet and some coins now and a free Libertariat when they are available. There's already a solid one posted courtesy of Odinborn.

    I'm the judge so we'll work something out. Maybe I pick the 3 I like the best and we vote on them. Or I just pick. Or, if no one really participates, maybe I don't give anything away.

    So, either get your creative juices flowing, or go find some acerbic witted wordsmith to write yours. But....go.

    https://www.amazon.com/ESEE-Knives-...&qid=1499427101&sr=8-1&keywords=expat+cleaver
     
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  2. Expat

    Expat Expat™ Knives Staff Member

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    By the way, funny question/answers are all eligible too.
     
  3. Boker55

    Boker55 Member

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    Lol "worse state ever"
     
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  4. mtngoat

    mtngoat Member

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    Ok so I posted another on we will see if this one gets allowed.
     
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  5. jlowrance

    jlowrance Member

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    I submitted a review. Unfortunately, it got rejected. I'm not sure if it was because I said it would be bigger than the infant circumcision trainer or bigger than the book
    Natural Harvest: A collection of semen-based recipes. Either way I tried. But on the plus side I did get a question posted and answered.
     
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  6. Odinborn

    Odinborn Member

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    Only behind Ohio.
     
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  7. Getnlwr

    Getnlwr Member

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    I reviewed it and amazon actually posted it.

    Managed to include this in the review.

    Anything can be a dildo if you’re brave enough.
     
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  8. RocketmanDane

    RocketmanDane Member

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    We will see if Amazon takes the bait :)
     
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  9. RocketmanDane

    RocketmanDane Member

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    And they took mine :)
     
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  10. Expat

    Expat Expat™ Knives Staff Member

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    You guys are nuts!

    Bringing the ESEE Forum Mentality to the masses...and I don't think they're quite ready for that.
     
  11. Getnlwr

    Getnlwr Member

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    I tried to add a little Arfcom, Esee, and hot tub time machine to it.

    I forwarded the review to my girlfriend. She was um... Surprised. To say the least.
     
  12. Odinborn

    Odinborn Member

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    Looks like we have a real good running for this contest. Some funny stuff going on at Amazon now.
     
  13. Expat

    Expat Expat™ Knives Staff Member

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    People are going to think only complete psychos are buying this cleaver.


    And they would be right.
     
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  14. Odinborn

    Odinborn Member

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    The crazy part is that Amazon has sold 11 cleavers since we started this contest. So we must be appealing to the disturbed demographic
     
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  15. Expat

    Expat Expat™ Knives Staff Member

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    Im sure they are selling in spite of the reviews, not because of them.
     
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  16. Expat

    Expat Expat™ Knives Staff Member

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    I wuld like to see a review consisting of a cleaver and an 8' 2"x4". How long would it take someone to turn that pice of wood into a pile of toothpicks?
     
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  17. Odinborn

    Odinborn Member

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    I would do it but I don't have a camcorder or YouTube account.
     
  18. timdgsr

    timdgsr Member

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    Camcorder? You don't have a phone that records video?
     
  19. Expat

    Expat Expat™ Knives Staff Member

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    Nobody has a camcorder.


    Unless that person also has a time machine.
     
  20. JKPirate08

    JKPirate08 Member

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    I've got a thick sketch pad, if I draw enough pictures, and you flip through it fast enough, it might work?
     

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